Brent Sweitzer (04:05):
There's nothing to worry about. Try instead, just to say what you see, you know, a simple statement, like I can say that I can see that that made you pretty upset or wow. You feel frustrated with that assignment that you were working on, putting words to their emotional experience, acknowledging it, that it's real by naming it, it helps your child feel understood by you. And when they feel this, they can begin to self-sooth and they can begin to solve problems for themselves, even the problem that that may be causing the emotional upset. And that's an experience we want our kids to have of being able to kind of have that self-direction. So to give you an example, or a vivid example of, of this in real life if you there's a, if you Google the phrase still face experiment, you'll really, and it's on YouTube and it's been seen a bunch of times.
Brent Sweitzer (05:01):
If you look that up, you'll see the power of parental responsiveness in a child and it's with a baby, but the principles that are applied to there really extend throughout childhood and into adulthood. The subtleties of the ways that we as parents respond to our kids' emotions have such an effect on their ability to self-regulate and again, solve problems for themselves. So just to summarize, the key is to start with how you feel and being aware of your own emotional experience and the things in your children that might trigger you. You know, if they have a hard time with something being aware of what that could be for you and, you know, putting that oxygen mask on yourself before you put it on them. And then as you do that, just tuning into your kid's emotional experience by saying what you see and reflecting that back to them, this helps them feel understood by you and seen by you, which will help them still feel better and also regulate.
Make sure to watch the full documentary on childhood emotions. You'll learn how to help your child manage their own emotions. You'll learn about your own emotions and how they affect your child. And you'll learn simple ways of helping children improve behavior.
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