Has your child ever said anything like:
“I am not smart”
Or
“I am not good at _____”
Or, in some other way, expressed that they feel stupid?
Hearing that may have felt horrible to you. It’s tough to hear. If this happens there is something very important to consider.
The Power Of Expectations.
Poor grades do not mean low intelligence!
Poor grades mean something is going wrong! The way your child is wired to learn is not matching the way they are being taught.
However! Trying to change the school system is an almost impossible task. So don't go that route unless you want to commit your entire life to it (Some Do) Instead, simply help your child learn in different ways. Which gives them a huge advantage anyway.
There are many potential learning strategies.
We can think in different ways. And developing these different ways is actually a huge advantage in life.
It makes us:
- Logical when we need to be logical.
- Creative when we need to be creative.
- Emotionally intelligent when we need to be emotionally intelligent.
There are more ways than one to use that magnificent brain.
And if you do, your child get's to keep their gifts and learn new ones too.
The Building Blocks Of Learning
We do this by developing the learning micro-skills. These are the fundamental building blocks of learning.
And when we help a child develop these building blocks of learning they naturally develop a variety of learning strategies.
When they have many learning strategies they can easily adapt to different teaching styles.
They can choose the most efficient learning strategy for whatever they are trying to learn at the moment. Without even thinking about it.
Expectations Are Critically Important
When a child like yours struggles It’s never because of intelligence.
Unfortunately, kids assume it is. They quickly assume they are “stupid”. And once they assume that they will do everything possible to not let anyone else discover their “secret”
They’d rather get in trouble than let anyone discover it.
They’d rather be seen as lazy than let anyone discover it.
To them, it’s a deep dark secret and they’ll do anything to hide it. Even though it’s not true. They just think it’s true. And they think no one will like them if it’s discovered.
This is the root of their loss of self-esteem.
This is the reason for them acting out.
Key Takeaways:
Teacher's Expectations
When a teacher assumes that a child is not intelligent this reinforces the child’s belief.
Or it can actually cause it.
The child will then begin to live up (or down) to that belief. Because of this, you have to be very careful with things like IEP's (individualized education plans) or official diagnosis. Although these things can sometimes be helpful they can more often be damaging.
Simply because they reduce the expectations for the child.
The remedy?
High expectations!
That’s not to say ignore the problem.
That’s not the idea at all.
Acknowledge the current difficulty, but also expect to get through it.
Expect your child to excel. Even when it’s hard to do so.
Over and over I’ve seen this simple, but not easy tactic work wonders.
I’ve worked with kids and set my own expectations way beyond what anyone believed the children were capable of. I didn’t know if they were capable but I simply set in my mind that they were. This caused me to act as if they were. And eventually, they proved me right.
Expect it until they make it!
It’s a difficult mindset to have. Especially when you are super worried.
But mindset can be magical.
Do You Need help with a Learning Difficulty?
Our simple online analysis will help you get to the core of the problem and find the right solution for you.
Understanding how to help someone with a learning difficulty starts with understanding which micro-skills are affected. When you learn which of the micro-skills is the problem, you will then be on your way to solving it.
You'll also learn how to:
- Build confidence
- Enhance Learning ability
- Eliminate avoidance
- Build grit
You can get this analysis for free by filling out this simple form. This will help you get to the bottom of a learning difficulty and provide you with a solution. If you are ready to put this problem behind you click the button below and fill out the form.
