This is my daughter's 6th grade year. She has had an IEP every year since she started kindergarten. I am very pleased with the IEPs. They give some definition to the process of her learning. The goals and methods, the percentages are all very specific information. Having that specific information enables me to give specific input and make specific requests. I am in a school district that is known for its excellence. That being said, I know plenty of parents who are NOT happy with their child's IEP.
One year I hired an educational consultant - former teacher - who did all the negotiating for me. I knew I was going to want some specifics that the IEP team would not necessarily want and I did not want to be the "bad guy". She used all their lingo and almost humored them into it. It was wonderful to be able to sit back and watch. As we approach junior high and high school, we may have to go that route again but we'll wait and see.
My daughter's teachers and school have done an excellent job. Do I wish they did more? Of course. But it isn't a private tutor, it is a public school, so I am grateful for how well my daughter is doing and the fact that the staff takes as much interest in her success as I do!