Dashed dreams?
The problem is too many parents get stuck here for one reason or another. Maybe your child doesn’t qualify for school testing yet (I once taught in a school district that required the student two fail two grades before they’d even consider testing for a disability). Maybe you’re still convinced that a little more homework help or time or better incentives will fix the problem for your child.
I encourage you to read up on the 5 stages of loss as you face the possibility of a learning disability in your child. It’s important to recognize that you will have to grieve, at some point or another, the very real loss of a dream.
The usual stages of grief are:
- Denial (“There’s nothing wrong with my child. He’s just…”)
- Anger (“He’s not working hard enough!” or “The teacher just doesn’t like her.”)
- Bargaining (“If I just put aside 15 minutes a day to practice _________ with my child, then the problem will go away.”)
- Depression (“I don’t know what to do, and I don’t think we will ever overcome this problem.”)
- Acceptance (“My child doesn’t learn the same way as other kids, and we have to address this problem in order for him/her to succeed.”)
The silver lining
No matter where you are in your diagnosis (and grief) journey, take a look at the symptoms of several of the most common learning disorders. You can check them out here.
Does one particular cluster of symptoms fit? Does your child appear to have one of the common learning disabilities? If going through these symptoms, you continue to suspect there might be a learning disability, don’t deny it. Your child needs you right now.