Why Children Resist Homework

Kelsey Komorowski - Komo Consulting - Do identify the source of the resistance. Okay. Getting past the, I just don't like it. I don't wanna do it.

It's stupid. And really drilling down to uncover the genuine reason for the resistance. Okay. Some students resist out of fear. Right. They're afraid that if they try, they won't actually be able to do it, and they'd rather not try than fail. Um, some think that they're bad at the subject, right? I'm just bad at math.

I don't have a brain,  math brain or what have you. Um, other students just think it's irrelevant, right? When am I ever gonna have to do this? Why would I bother? It's a waste of time. So there are a lot of potential reasons for why your child is resisting homework, and absolute number one is identifying what is the real reason for why they're resisting.

And then from there, depending on what that reason is, that is what will determine the strategies and the next best steps to take.

Arvin Vohra - Vohra Method - So let's look at what causes people to, what causes students to simply not want to do any homework at all. The most common situation, the most common, and this is 99.9% of situations, is that there's some underlying issue, some underlying gap in understanding or knowledge that is causing the student to not be able to even understand what the homework is. So, uh, to use this very simple example, suppose that the homework is about multiplication and the student doesn't understand addition, and all the student's able to do in that situation is basically try to commit some random formulas, rules of thumb to rote, none of which is going to help his long term or even short term understanding.

This process is so pointless and so unpleasant that many students will simply refuse to do it. Now when their younger students they can't necessarily explain that, they can't say, Listen, listen, you know, mom, or, Listen dad, I'm missing some underlying cognitive concepts, and I feel that they're, they're just gonna say they don't wanna do it.

It's really easy to misinterpret this as laziness, but it is almost never laziness. It is not Laziness. Just like a kid who's saying I can't play anymore in soccer is not being lazy, just might be injured. When a, when a, when a student is saying that I cannot do this, I don't want to do this, it is almost never laziness. It is almost always an underlying gap. And the first thing that you need to do is to find those underlying gaps.

Kelsey Komorowski - Komo Consulting - Do assess whether your child knows how to do their school work. So what does this mean? This means does your child know how to work through their assignments? Do they know how to study? Okay. If they can't articulate to you the specific steps to take to manage their course load, manage their time, Work through an assignment from beginning, from receipt of guidelines to a submission of the final product.

If they're not clear on exactly how to do those things, what the steps are, then they don't know how to do their work, and there's your main challenge right there. Okay. Now, luckily every student can learn how to do the work, but that's a really big one, is assessing do they actually know how to do it?

It's really hard to do something when you don't know how and if you don't know how, that leads to a lot of frustration when you have to do it. So that's a real big one that we see with homework resistance is that how piece.

Nicole Black - Coffee and Carpool - As an ex teacher, I kind of look at homework as. Communication. And if you look at it that way, you won't be so annoyed by it when your kids are fighting you on it.

So I look at it as what the teacher is sending home is what they're working on in class. It's really helpful for me to know. Sometimes my kids get in the car and I'm like, What'd you do today? They're like, I dunno. They have no memory of what they did. It's kind of ridiculous. Like, well, it just happened.

So the homework coming. You know, teachers say that it's a reinforcer, but it's also the communication, Oh, you're working on this right now in school, and it's a really good way for us to know. Also, if our kids are struggling with their homework, that's our cue to know that it's too hard for them and they're struggling in class.

Nandi Nelson - Author - We first want to explore if it is a can't do problem or if it is a won't do problem if it is that we are faced with a can't do problem. This is more related to skill deficits, which could be barriers to your child being able to complete their homework or even initially engage with the homework task.

Liz Weaver - Learning Success - If your child might have some underlying issues that are preventing them from doing well in school, then the answer is the Learning Success System. The learning success system helps you build up your child's learning micro-skills so that learning becomes easier for them. It also builds confidence and grit, both very important for your child's long-term success.

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Veronica Richard PhD. - Dissertation Coach - So if learners believe that they do not know enough or do not have the skills to be successful, um, the, the act of resisting becomes one of saving face. That is we would rather choose to disengage than to admit that we are struggling. And that we are failing it.

It goes back to really, um, saving our, our reputation, if you will. Um, and so in, in, in thinking of this and thinking of it in that way, we want to help learners and our children get past this idea that I'm not good enough.

Nick Prutting - Academic Tutor - So monitoring stress levels. Kids don't wanna do things that they find stressful, they just avoid it if we really think about it, it's a pretty natural human behavior.

And when something is new, confusing, hard to understand and it frustrates us, we tend to avoid it. And our kids are no different.

Kari O'Driscoll - Author - Observe your kids for a while before you start to have a conversation. So maybe, um, try to really pay attention to whether there are particular classes or particular kinds of homework that your child is resistant to doing.

Um, that can give you a lot of information if they're resistant to doing the homework. That's the math. worksheets that are just, you know, hundreds and hundreds of math problems. Um, but they don't seem to mind the reading homework or, um, creating an art project that has something to do with what they're reading.

Um, then that can give you some insight right there.

Veronica Richard PhD. - Dissertation Coach - I see the two biggest factors as the person does not believe that he or she is capable of completing the tasks successfully. Or that the person does not see value in the task.

Tania Dasilva - Behavior Matters - The first things that we always explore is, is there a learning disability? Is there a processing disorder?

Um, are they autistic? Is there adhd, anxiety, depression? Is there something else going on that might be contributing to the resistance?

Veronica Richard PhD. - Dissertation Coach - Start to identify what is causing them the problems. If they can start doing that now, they will have more success as they move forward in their education and in their lives.

Nancy Irwin Psyd - Therapist - I always suggest a medical checkup. Make sure we can rule out any vision, any hearing, any learning disorders, processing disorders, et cetera. Uh, are they getting enough sleep? Are they getting proper nutrition enough exercise, enough rest? Are they being bullied? Talk to teachers and see what you can do  Parents, to form a coalition to help the child know they have a safe place where they can share if there's any sort of abuse or discomfort going on

Dr Megan Lott - Optometrist - doing homework, they could have underlying visual problems. And I don't need 2020, or they're not able to seek. Clearly what I'm talking about are functional visual problems.

Whenever a child's asked to look up close, their eyes have to turn in, they have to focus and make it clear. Um, their eyes have to track. So when a child's been at School all day and they've asked to have these visual demands. If they are lacking in any of these areas and they're having to overcome it by the time they get home, at the end of the day, their eyes are exhausted.

Or maybe they've been playing a handheld video game or doing something else at a near-point range, and then when it's time for homework, their eyes just physically have very difficult time turning in or focusing to see clearly actions that you may see when this happens. They may repeat. Um, Skip words, lose their place in reading, have poor reading comprehension, complain of headaches, eye fatigue.

And these may not be, um, excuses just to get out of homework. These could be legitimate excuses.

Nick Prutting - Academic Tutor - They're already avoiding it because they're stressed, so we need to ask. How can we help manage and decrease the stress level rather than increase it? What can we provide that can remove that stress? Again, if we identify the root cause of the stress, we'll be better equipped to find the right solution for it.

What is causing it? Where is it coming from? Is it a lack of confidence in general? That this individual child struggles with? Is it a tendency to become overwhelmed by homework and school work, or is it a genuine, genuine difficulty to engage with specific types of subject matter? We need to identify which one it is before we can build a solution for it.